Do you wish you were that Defence Lawyer who jumps up in an American courtroom and snaps, “We would stipulate to the facts”? Second question: do you know what that expression even means?

Let’s turn now to a story about someone who does know (to divert your attention from the fact that we don’t.)

This Perthville Defence Lawyer defends the innocent, all the time, and always wins. So now that she has decided to contribute her skills pro bono to the toxic sludge crisis (TSC), she will carefully collect the facts, interview all parties in contention, and clear up the whole unsightly mess.

She’s a bright-eyed woman who is still talking as though justice is not dead in Perthville. “I’m extremely concerned at the false accusations flying against scouts and farmers, i.e. the little people. The little people are the ones that make the big people big, but I’m here to make the little people bigger. And let’s stipulate to that.”

Ya huh.