We’ve caused them a great deal of stress recently, haven’t we?

Everyone knows that stress causes high blood pressure, and if you’ve got that, doctors have to prescribe medicine to fix it.

Sharks are no different.

“We should be monitoring their blood pressure,” says Perthville’s Heart Surgeon, “1 – because an elevated heart reading of a nearby shark could be beamed to lifeguards, who’ll clear the water of swimmers; and 2 – because then we can give sharks drugs for their heart problems, and that’ll be easy, as the pharmaceutical industry is full of sharks.”

In Perthville, you may see this shark-loving Heart Surgeon inspecting the drum lines and inserting heart monitors into captured sharks on the spot.

For once, the Heart Surgeon will not get paid just for doing a consultation, but instead based on patient satisfaction.

If this patient does not like the service, the Heart Surgeon will know straightaway.